In an introduction of Gary Haugen at an IJM event, the MC recounted a conversation they had early on in their friendship. He commented how amazing he found it that Haugen was able to return from such trauma and start IJM. Had he been in Gary’s shoes during his initial trip to Rwanda with the  Department of Justice and witnessed the horror Haugen describes in his book, he personally would still be Continue reading…

My heart is not proud, O LORD, my eyes are not haughty; I do not concern myself with great matters or things too wonderful for me. But I have stilled and quieted my soul; like a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me. O Israel, put your hope in the LORD both now and forever more. Psalm 131 (NIV)

The opening of Psalm 131 has always caused some cognitive dissonance for me. On one hand, I don’t want to settle for mediocre. I want to constantly do it better, to meet the highest standards and demands…and to understand what just happened! My aversion for regret refuses to let me settle for less, even when it’s better to count my losses and get out. Although I’ve never read it, Bill Hybel’s book title, Holy Discontent, resonates with me.

On the other hand, this Psalm and Paul’s example of being “content in any and every situation”¹ are always in the back of my mind when crazy ideas and hopes to change things for the better pop up.² Robert Browning wrote, “A man’s reach should exceed his grasp, or what’s a heaven for?” Being a creative and a visionary, I gravitate toward that sentiment. Being a Christian, I want to keep that sentiment in the context of God.

Definition

One of my favorite definitions of humility comes from a former high school student who returned to our youth group to deliver a lesson.

Humility is remembering your rightful place before God.

Eugene Peterson quotes another similar definition in the introduction to his chapter on Humility.

Humility is the obverse side of confidence in God, whereas pride is the obverse side of confidence in self. John Baillie

I like those better than the more common definitions of “thinking less of yourself,” “thinking of yourself less,” or “not thinking of yourself.” Those definitions seemed contradictory to the reality that we exist and are created in the image of God, thereby carrying some inherent (albeit sin-scarred) value. Besides, it’s impossible to not think of the very vehicle through which you depend on to work out your salvation, whether it is your physical body or your emotional state or your intellectual understanding.

Peterson addresses this in his analysis of verse 2.

But if we are not to be proud, clamorous, arrogant persons, what are we to be? Mousy, cringing, insecure ones? Well, not quite. Having realized the dangers of pride, the sin of thinking too much of ourselves, we are suddenly in danger of another mistake, thinking too little of ourselves. There are some who conclude that since the great Christian temptation is to try to be everything, the perfect Christian solution is to be nothing. And so we have the problem of the doormat Christian and the dishrag saint: the person upon whom everyone walks and wipe their feet, the person who is used by others to clean up the mess of everyday living and then is discarded. These people then compensate for their poor lives by weepily clinging to God, hoping to make up for the miseries of everyday life by dreaming of luxuries in heaven. (154)

So, it seems humility is about focus, not ignorance. On our path toward God, we grow in humility when we emphasize focusing on God rather than ignoring ourselves.

Application

Something that has recently been bothering me more is the comparison that happens in ministry and among ministry leaders. In particular, almost every cross-cultural ministry team I’ve been on included some comment during debriefing (or training) about how much more difficult it is to be a Christian “over there.” While that sounds compassionate, I’ve always sensed an undercurrent of pride that I couldn’t quite explain. Even though the conclusion usually ended up being, “they are some of the strongest Christians I’ve ever met…far stronger than we are in the United States,” the spirit of comparison seemed out of place.

I think it has something to do with this:

All cultures throw certain stumbling blocks in the way of those who pursue gospel realities. It is sheerest fantasy to suppose that we would have had an easier time of it as Christian believers if we were in another land or another time. It is no easier to be a Chinese Christian than to be a Spanish Christian than to be a Russin Christian than to be a Brazilian Christian than to be an American Christian — nor more difficult. The way of faith deals with realities in whatever time and whatever culture. (150)

Every humanly developed culture has its challenges to the ones who want to live according to God’s Kingdom culture. For most Eastern cultures, it is overt idolatry: another god. But for Western cultures (or, at least, major metropolitan United States), it’s more covert idolatry: still another god. Peterson thinks it is ambition (p.153), and I’m inclined to agree.

Ambition is aspiration gone crazy. Aspiration is the channeled, creative energy that moves us to growth in Christ, shaping goals in the Spirit. Ambition takes these same energies for growth and development and uses them to make something tawdry and cheap, sweatily knocking together a Babel when we could be vacationing in Eden. (153)

There are other gods, I’m sure, but ambition is pretty high on the top of our list, even for Christians. We just euphemize it and call it “pursuing God’s best.” The challenge, and one mark of mature faith, is to be able to live at the edge of aspiration without crossing over into ambition.

Personal Challenge

In the beginning of the chapter, Peterson calls this psalm a “maintenance psalm” (p. 149) and compares it to pruning.³

…it gets rid of that which looks good to those who don’t know any better, and reduces the distance between our hearts and their roots in God. (149)

In between the paragraphs, I wrote a quick prayer almost 9 years ago that God would help me recognize and release that which looks good because I don’t know any better. Not too sure how often I’ve followed up on seeking Him in that…it seems my life has recently gotten busier with good things, “God things.” Am I willing to let go of the things that look good but am really doing for my security, not His purposes? Am I willing to cease activity and take the time to even ask Him about that?

1. Philippians 4.12 [↩]
2. Ironically, Paul is one of the most far-reaching people I’ve every come across. Still, there’s a difference between the apostle Paul (who was by no means perfect) and the earlier Saul. Other character comparisons to look at: Peter in the Gospels and Peter of 1st and 2nd Peter; Paul and Peter? [↩]
3. interesting…another reference to a garden, along with Eden in above quote [↩]